Looking for a monster...

I tend to neglect the story that I'm working on almost as much as I neglect this blog. Or rather, I'd say it gets even more neglected. Because I can come on here and ramble about nothing but I actually have to be eloquent and productive on my story. I happen to really like it, so I want it to be good. Unfortunately, that means that we spend a lot of time apart. My expectations for it are just too high to meet on a regular basis I guess. I realize that this isn't a good way to go about working on a story, but I don't seem to be able to convince myself to just write and not care.

But anyway.

It's gotten to a point where I feel like I need some more action. Haven't had any since pretty near the beginning. So I figure my party ought to run into a monster or two while wandering in the woods. So I need a monster for them to run into. Nothing too bad, as the main characters are just learning how to fight with staves, but enough that there'll be an interesting battle scene. There have been a lot of talking scenes lately and it is most definitely time to break up the monotony. Unfortunately, the only thing I have in my head are Spidrens, which is a complete and utter copy of Tamora Pierce's book Wild Magic, wherein Daine and Onua encounter a group of Spidrens while they're on their way back to Corus. I'm not trying to be "OMG SO TOTALLY ORIGINAL!!" but I don't want this to copy the flow of action scene for scene from my favorite YA books.

So. A different monster. One that's about on level with the Spidrens in that it's totally scary to encounter if you're not used to the fantastic but it is also possible for some experienced fighters to dispatch without a huge amount of strain. I'm kind of thinking that the girls will end up hiding behind a rock or something though. I'm going for a bit of realism here, in that you do not become a master fighter in a week while you are also traveling most of the day.

Oh, and spiders aren't entirely bad in this story... in fact, the whole point of the quest is to try to save some incorporeal spiders from some unknown force.... but that's neither here nor there. THE POINT IS I need a monster.

EDIT: This is not the kind of monster I'm looking for at all.

But I totally need to make these now!!

Procrastination Station

I've killed a few more goals! Hurray! Unfortunately, I have been slacking on the picture taking side... which makes things difficult to document. I could tell you that I came in second in a cake decorating competition (YAY!) after putting in probably at least 20 hours off the clock on the stupid thing, but it's no fun unless you have a picture of the cake to oggle. So I'll tell you more about that later when I remember to bring my camera to the store and snap a couple pictures of my (and my co-workers'!) prize winning cakes! I also need to double check with people about the exact awarding of the prizes. I know that we cleaned up, but I've heard different things about how the cupcakes placed...

Also, I made naan! Or rather, we made naan! Caitlin (i.e. my soulmate and heterosexual life partner) came to visit for four days last week. Which was amazing. I'm so sad that she had to go back home, but we know that it won't be forever. But we made naan and it was good, but didn't take pictures! So I'll make it again soonish and take pictures because a blog with no pictures is no fun. And I still need pictures of the house. Geez, I'm bad about this!

Sometimes I think that procrastination should be considered an art form. If it were, I'd be certain to win some great awards for it.

In other words, my phone gave up the ghost a few days ago, due to NO fault of my own. The touchscreen just went white and refuses to be fixed. Thankfully, they're sending me another one. Yay! And it will be here today! YAY! Unfortunately, I have to make sure I'm here when it gets here so I can sign for the package, which means I'm pretty much chained to the house today... which isn't awful, there's stuff I need to do around here, but there were other things I wanted to do outside of my house as well... oh well, those will have to wait. Maybe I should get back to work on the saddle pad that is cut out and ready to sew... or make some polo wraps!

Best news of all though, I paid off my credit card! Hurray! We're not completely debt free yet, still have my car payments to chip away at, but it'll get there! It's so nice to not have that hanging over my head, and I'm one step closer to my goal of living debt free!

New House

We finally got the internet connected today, hurray! It also occurred to me as I was glancing over the posts that I had written in the middle of my 12 hour overnight shifts at the ranch, that I never actually wrote about the resolution to our housing problem. Not that it was anything dramatic or inspiring. We just got lucky that a block of houses on base just got finished and approved for residency. There was, of course, no lack of squealing and jumping up and down when we got the call.

So, new house! Brand new house! We are officially the first residents which is at the same time awesome and daunting. I was putting the dish with baked spaghetti in the oven tonight and noticing how incredibly shiny the inside of the oven was... shinier than any I'd ever seen. Now I'm scared to death of messing it up. Oh well, do our best to keep it looking nice, especially since we'll have to pay for every little nick in the moldings!

Overall, life is good and the house is amazing. There have been a few snaffus, but nothing that isn't easy to deal with. We were warned that the foundation might still be settling, and to watch out for cracks along the walls for that reason. With our luck, of course, there were. As we were beginning to move our stuff into the house out of the garage, where we unloaded the moving truck to, we got a knock on our door from the maintenance guys. Apparently someone had been by for a last-minute inspection and noticed cracks in the downstairs bathroom. They guys were really nice (and loved the dogs). They got the cracks patched up (found another one on the stairs and in the kitchen, boo!) and everything is good as new. We just have to keep an eye out for more cracks appearing so they can fix them before they become an issue.

The other small issue is the yard... lack of yard, rather. Due to the flood, there have been strict watering bans in place for a while as the city tries to conserve clean water. Because of this, the landscaping around the new units is a little behind schedule. So we don't have a lawn. We have dirt. And, as of yesterday, a few shrubs out front. The only real problem with this (other than it looks kind of ugly and I don't get to feel the soft grass between my toes while hanging out outside with the dogs) is that we have to wait until the lawn has grown enough for the root system to be established before they'll give us control and responsibility of it. Which means we can't put up a fence yet. There are really strict pet restrictions on base, so if I put my dogs out on their tethers, I have to sit out there with them. It makes it harder to let them outside to potty while I'm getting ready for work in the morning, but it just means I'll have to be up a few minutes earlier. Oh well. I'm sure I can live. The important thing is that we should be able to have a fence up by winter before it starts to snow. I'll be really sad if I have to sit out there with them during a blizzard...

The advantage is that I've gotten to take them on some nice long walks since we moved in, exploring the neighborhood. Had to put them back in their gentle-leaders, as apparently coming to a new place means that they no longer remember any of the training from before, but they're remembering quickly with the head-collars back on.

So life is good. Moving forward Trying not to dwell on what we can't control. Unpacking is tedious, but we're working on it, slowly and steadily. Learning the new way of life that comes with living on a military base. Overall, things are looking up again. Which is a nice change of pace, certainly.

#28 - back again!

Apparently when I made my list I had a double in there somewhere. I don't remember what it was that I had doubled, but I deleted one of them and there has been an empty spot staring at me ever since. I finally decided on a goal to put in there, though I feel like it's cheating a little bit since it's something that I'm planning on doing anyway, but heck, it's still an accomplishment! The store that I work at decorating cakes always enters the competition at the Annual Grocers convention. Or something. Anyway, usually, we clean up. They brought home five awards last year, including two first places, a second and a third. I don't know what the fifth was, unfortunately. Probably my boss's fish cake. But suffice to say, we've got a pretty good reputation. It's a high standard to live up to, but my friends have offered to help me with my cake to make sure it's competition worth. I'm working on deciding on a design that is doable right now. I found a really cute rocking horse cake that my friend wants me to do for my novelty entry. I'm going to have to see how my time is looking as the competition approaches, but I'm thinking of doing cupcakes as well. I'm picturing some sort of coral reef idea, though I'm not sure how I would put the display together and what I'm picturing might be completely outside of my ability level. Some more research and planning will definitely be in order.

Competition is the weekend of September 10th, so it'll be coming up soon.

In the meantime, this is overnight shift #2 and I'm almost finished. I'm really hoping that I have the hotel room to myself tonight so I can get some sleep. I'm not going to make it through night #3 if I don't get some rest today. I can't wait until we get back into Minot next week.

I'm also playing with a plan in my mind to start getting back into serious riding. There are a lot of variables though, so I'm going to hold off a bit before I reveal it to anyone.

Why you should practice running barefoot

To start off with, an uplifting update! We are in housing! We only had to stay at my friends' house fro about two and a half weeks before they had something ready for us on base, which is incredibly lucky. They just completed a new section of housing, so we're the first residents of our home! Which has its advantages and disadvantages. On the up side, no damage or anything from previous residents. Awesome. Disadvantage, since it's so incredibly brand new, a lot of things aren't quite as finished as they would ideally be. For example, we have no lawn. Just dirt. Which will eventually be lawn. Because of the flood, water conservation has been a major button issue lately (seems odd, doesn't it? Because there is too much water we need to conserve it? But the problem is clean water, since many water lines were broken or contaminated during the flooding) and therefore there was a ban on watering lawns. Putting down grass seed when you can't water is a waste of time, so they've been waiting. The ban has recently been lifted, so they're going to put down seed soon and we're hoping to have the grass up and the roots well enough established to "take over" the care of our lawn by the end of September, beginning of October. At that point, we can buy or rent (most likely rent, seeing as we don't know how long we'll be in Minot) fencing for the backyard so that we can let the dogs out to play without having to worry too much about them.

Which brings me to the title of this post.

I am not a very big person. I'm about five feet and one inch tall with a very petite frame. I weigh maybe 120 lbs. but if I were in peak physical condition (which I haven't been in quite a while) my ideal weight would probably be closer to 105-110. I own two large dogs who are both pushing 80 lbs. I am very adamant about good obedience training with them because, quite frankly, I can't rely on strength to control them. They're too big. I've spent a lot of time working on door training with them so that they know that they are not to run out the door as soon as it opens, but wait for me to go through first and then issue them an invitiation to follow. This has the dual purpose of reinforcing my place in the "pack" as well as preventing "door dashing" while they go gallavanting across the neighborhood. Apparently, though, being in a new house makes them forget everything they've ever learned.

I got up this morning shortly after Matt left for work and went to take the dogs out. We had set teather stakes close to the house so that we can let them wander a bit before we can get fencing put in, though base regulations require that we supervise them while they're tied up. Not too much of a problem. Both dogs were sitting politely behind me as I opened the door this morning and reached out to grab the teathers and hook them up. While I was bent over, Shadow slipped past me and trotted out into the yard.

It took him only a few seconds to realize that he wasn't attached to anything and that he could run, and with a joyous leap, he took off across the dirt that will eventually be the field between my house and the next. I swore with considerable color, slammed the door in poor Abby's face to keep her inside, and took off after him. Keep in mind that I had just gotten up. I had had the foresight to get dressed as there were supposed to be repair workers coming this morning to finish up some cracks that needed to be patched due to a settling foundation. So at least I wasn't running around bra-less in a way-oversized tank top and boxer shorts.

The difference between "the running game" when we're in a fenced area and when we're in the open with my dog, is that in a fenced area, it's "run in a circle, then come back for a scratch and run again". In the open, it's just "run as fast as I can! WHEE!" If it wasn't 8:30am and I wasn't terrified of a cop driving by and seeing my loose dog (leash laws are strictly enforced on base) I probably would have enjoyed seeing how incredibly happy he was about running. As it was, I was not amused in the least. I found myself hoping as we sprinted past other houses with fenced in back yards that someone would have a dog that would be outside already which would distract him long enough for me to get a hold of his collar. No dice. About 4 or 5 blocks later he found a bed of flowers with a very interesting scent, and I was able to walk up to him and grab a hold of his collar. I then stood there and heaved for a few minutes, as I don't know that I've ever sprinted that far before in my life. I am not normally the kind of runner built for speed. Wishing for a moment that I had a small dog that I could pick up and carry home, I then dragged him back by his collar, because I hadn't had time to grab his leash, and put him back inside.

My planned productive day of unpacking ended up being spent laying on the couch watching The Sound of Music because I had spent my entire day's worth of energy chasing the dog. I also took both dogs for an hour-long walk when the workers did show up, as they warned me that the mud they were using was going to stink something awful. The walk was more of a drag, because remembering training in a new palce is apparently incredibly difficult. I'm going to have to put both of them back in the Gentle Leaders for a while at least, until they remember how to walk on a leash.

The point is, I didn't even worry about not having shoes on, since that's how I always run. Now, my training runs are quite a bit slower than that and I haven't been training for the past few months, thus my exhaustion, but I didn't even hesitate to take off without shoes. And my feet feel fine now. I had a little bit of top of the foot pain, often associated with pushing yourself too hard in the barefoot world, but it has since subsided. I'm very surprised. If I'd tried to run that hard over uneven and soft terrain in running shoes, my ankles and knees would be killing me, and I ceratinly wouldn't be sitting cross-legged in this chair as I am, it woudl put too much pressure on the sore joints. It really is amazing what the human body is capable of. When I needed to, I didn't think at all about running or form, where to optimize my strike, my posture, staying relaxed. I just ran. My body just took over and did things right.

#99 Volunteering

Volunteering has always been a tricky subject for me. On the one hand, Heck yes! Volunteering! Helping your community! Awesomeness!
But on the other, I've always been crazy busy, and a lot of my "normal" activities are awfully feel good. Do I still need to volunteer when my job is helping teenagers recover from drug addictions and sexual abuse?

The answer, of course, is yes. There is no such thing as "good enough" when it comes to making the world a better place and helping out your fellow man. Trying to find a place to volunteer, that gets trickier though. Not that it's hard to find volunteer positions, but finding something that I'll actually enjoy and want to come back and do again, that's harder. I am unlikely to ever volunteer at a hospital because I just honestly don't like them very much. And anything that would be a fun job is probably a paid job, so I'd be miserable. And I'm not interested in misery. I want to volunteer as much to uplift my own life as those I'm helping. Which probably sounds selfish, but I think it's true of most people. I'm not adverse to hard work, but I want to get some benefit out of it, whether it's that feel-good feeling in your gut or just a fun afternoon. There needs to be some incentive and data-entry just doesn't quite make the cut, I'm afraid.

As I think I've mentioned before, Minot recently flooded. Like, holy bejeesus flooded. I've never been around this kind of flooding before and it's kind of freaky. Where I'm from, the water just goes down the hill and away. It's why you don't live right on the river. We get mudslides, but not standing water that lasts for months. Lots of people have been displaced and lost their homes. People are living in hotels and staying with friends. We were lucky enough to find friends who welcomed our animals into their home, but not everyone has that luxury.

So a shelter was set up with kennels and cages, a place that people could leave their pets until they were in a situation to reclaim them. Buildings were filled with dog kennels and distressed animals of all shapes and sizes. There were full-time volunteer staff there from Noah's Wish who took charge of the volunteers and the immediate care of the animals, but volunteers from the community were still needed for simply tasks like walking the dogs. The job served two purposes. First, it got the dogs out of their kennels for a little while, which was very good for all of them. Also, it gave the staff there a chance to clean the kennels while the dogs were out and occupied.

It wasn't a glamorous job. I didn't spend the day strolling leisurely around the property with well-behaved and grateful pets. I think that they might have judged you to some degree on the leash that you grabbed in the beginning (I grabbed a heavy-duty nylon leash as I'm used to larger animals and I'm not easily intimidated. The woman in front of me took a delicate pink leash with rhinestones on it). I walked 5 dogs in a period of 3 hours, ranging from "Zeus" who could not contain his enthusiasm for being outside (we ran a few laps around the property) to the little Irish setter who was so intimidated by the whole situation that he spent most of his walk with his belly close to the ground. I did manage to pull a few ticks off of his scruff while we were there though.

All in all, it was a good day. I was tired and thirsty and hot and my arms hurt from being dragged by ill-mannered dogs, but it was a good day. I went home feeling good about myself and glad that I was able to help. I still don't feel like Minot is "home" or "my community" but I'm still living here. And I can still help to try to make it a better place and to help the members of it, both two and four legged.

I'm also intrigued by Noah's Wish now. Reading through their website, it sounds like their trip to Minot is one of the tamer "deployments" that they go on. They're often out rescuing and providing first aid to animals in major disaster situations, like the aftermath of hurricane Katrina. It might be something to keep in mind. We'll see.

Moving

I don't know what I'm hoping to accomplish by writing this down, but I'm writing it anyway. Maybe the two people who subscribe to this blog will enjoy reading it, or maybe it will sit lost in cyber space for a few years. Either way, here it is.

There is this strange underlying idea in our culture that once you reach *insert milestone* things will be different. Better. Problems will be solved. Now, logical thinking can tell you otherwise, and if you ask anyone who has passed *insert milestone* they can tell you, that nothing changes. Life is what it has always been, which is hard. Not miserable, I'm not about to go preaching the miseries of life, because I do believe that, fundamentally, life is good. But it's still hard. Things can be painful while still being good and hard while still being good. Running a marathon is the first thing that pops into my head. Anyone who has successfully competed in one could tell you that it is one of the greatest accomplishments and how good they felt about it afterward. However, if you ask how it actually felt during the race, no one is going to say "Great! I just kept an even pace and it was smooth sailing throughout the race!" Because it's not. It's hard. It's painful. You feel like you want to die. Or at least, I know that when I eventually make my marathon goal, I will. But it's still good. Pain can be divine.

But this idea persists, that once you achieve X then things will smooth out. We know this isn't true, but we keep hoping for it anyway. Maybe it's just to keep ourselves going, orienting on the next goal. "Soon," we think. "Soon all of this trouble will be over and my life can begin."

I'm moving this weekend. The series of events that led up to this is somewhat complicated and not something I want to really go into, as it just makes me mad and want to cry. But the fact remains. We have to be out of our current residence by Sunday.

Overall, not a terrible thing. We've been wanting to move, and were hoping to in the near future. Our current house is just too expensive for a number of reasons. It's bigger than we need and was poorly constructed originally when it was built as off-base housing for air force personnel. This makes it awful to heat during the winter, which is a major concern up here. The heat is all propane, which is horridly expensive, and we go through it at an unbelievable rate between heating the house, cooking, and hot water. The cost of gas for our cars is also killing us. I have a 30 mile commute daily, and with gas pushing towards four dollars a gallon, that means that it costs me almost an hour of work just to get there. Not a lot in and of itself, but over time it adds up. And having to put $50 in my tank every 4 days, well... it's not really the ideal situation for a couple trying to conserve funds. Matt ends up spending about the same, though he has a shorter drive, his jeep drinks quite a bit more gasoline than my little Subaru.

Then there's the opportunity cost and affect on our relationship of living out here. I think half of our fights stem from my frustration in how boring our life seems to be. We don't go out and do anything because the town we live in is literally 6 streets wide, population 467. There isn't anything here but a bar, a gas station, a cafe (which I never seem to be able to figure out when it's open) a school, and a post office. And a taxidermy shop that my dog is afraid of. Now, I'm a small town girl, I'm all about finding adventure in unlikely places, but with nothing but wheat fields for miles around, even I'm having trouble. Going into town to do something costs exponentially for us. Going to a movie might be $8.75 a piece, $11.75 if it's in 3D, plus $5 for snacks, comes out to around $25 for the movie alone. Throw in the price of gas, and we're looking at $40 just to go to a movie. Which we can do once in a while, but not often. It's maybe a once every other month treat, the month that we don't have to pay the gas bill. Even things that don't cost anything in town, like going to the park, we never get around to. By the time both of us get home from work, getting back in the car to drive down to Minot again... not really what we're looking for. That would put me in the car for over two hours a day. No thank you.

So we sit around at home, watch movies, I bake, Matt plays video games, and that's not the life that either of us want.

So, moving in general was desired. The circumstances are just a little less than desirable.

You see, we have no where to move to.

With the recent flooding in Minot, hundreds of people have been displaced from their homes. We were hoping to get into base housing, but the recent influx of flood victims has their capacities bursting at the seams. The same goes for any rental we might find closer to town. Not only is there nothing available, but in accordance with the law of supply and demand, the price on everything has skyrocketed. There was an ad in the paper the other day for a one bedroom apartment for $2500 a month. Now, you might expect to pay that if you're living in New York City, but this is Minot, North Dakota. Our allowance for housing that we receive from the military is considerably under a grand. But people are desperate and just trying to find somewhere to put their families. Not much to do about it.

So as of Sunday, we're homeless. Well, not completely. One of my coworkers and friends has been incredibly generous and offered us the spare bedroom in her house. She said that she doesn't want us there for the next 5 years, but we're welcome to stay as long as we need to until we can find something else. I'm incredibly grateful for this, but moving in with another family is not really what you look forward to following your wedding. Or having to pack up all of your things and put them into storage, organizing them in such a way that, should we be stuck in this situation when the temperatures start dropping, we can still get to all of our cold-weather gear. The honeymoon is most definitely over.

And that brings me back to what I was saying at the beginning. Despite  everything that we know (because we are both relatively intelligent and educated people) we both had this idea in our head that after we got married, everything would be easier. I'd have access to base, be able to shop at the Commissary (which would save us some money), we'd move into base housing (which would save us a LOT of money) get on his healthcare, and overall we'd be able to stop fretting about every little thing. But that's not the case.

I'm still thrilled to be married. I love my husband more every day, even on the days when he frustrates me. Our wedding was a blast and I'd do it again in a heartbeat. This current situation just sucks.

Oh, and to top it all off? Matt has weekend duty this weekend. So he can't be here during the day to help me pack and load the trailer. We'll have to do all of the moving into storage after he gets off.... sometime. It's an easy weekend, so if everyone gets their act together, he should be out early. But there's a possibility that he could be stuck there for a 12 hour shift. And no one would trade with him which makes me incredibly angry. He's taken shifts for other guys countless times for no more reason than "hey, I've got plans this weekend, can you take my shift for me?" Sure dude, no problem. I've got your back. We thought it might be reciprocated. Guess we were wrong. Asshats.

But, despite all of this, I still think that life is good. We have somewhere to go now (our first plan was  a tent... not really what we were hoping for!) and a new storage unit facility just opened up, so we were able to snag some space for our larger items. We're probably still going to have to get rid of a lot of things, but streamlining isn't always a bad thing. We do have an awful lot of crap.

We're still crossing our fingers for orders. That would solve all of these problems in one fell swoop, although it would create a few more. I'm pretty sure I can roll with those though. We're just not looking forward to another winter spent here. I want to be somewhere closer to the coast. I'm done with the midwest. There are things that I love about Minot, but it doesn't overshadow how much I dislike living in North Dakota. Only a matter of time though, we'll be out of here eventually.

I guess that's how I can make it through all of this. Life is ever changing, so even though our circumstances right now are considerably less than ideal, they won't be the same for long. For better or for worse, something will change. That's just life.

#79 - Get Married

Check

Lemon Cupcakes

My goodness how time flies! The craziness that was the month of May is finally over and I'm looking forward to a future of bigger and better things. A brief itinerary of the next few weeks:

Last Monday (I know, I said future, but this is important) I started my new job at the Dakota Boys and Girls Ranch as a Resident Treatment Advisor (RTA). I'm excited for this opportunity as it gets me a lot closer to what I actually want to do (therapeutic riding/coaching para-dressage) AND I'll most likely be able to move more and more time towards the barn. Which is AWESOME. More time I get to spend with the ponies, the better. I probably won't be saying much more about my work on here from this point out, though, since most of the subject matter is highly confidential. The girls I work with are considered "high risk" for a variety of reasons and any information about them has to be kept pretty tight-lipped. They're a fun group though, and I think this is going to be an awesome opportunity.

Next Saturday I'm leaving on a train to head back HOME! To get ready for my WEDDING! I'm so excited. I can't wait to see everyone and hang out and get everything for the wedding done and make lots of pretty and delicious things with my bestest best friends.

Saturday July 2nd I'm getting MARRIED to the most amazing man I've ever met in my life. And he's starting to actually look forward to it as well, I do believe. :) I think it's taken him these 5 months for the fact that we're actually doing this to sink in.

After that, we're headed up to the Sunshine Coast in British Columbia for a honeymoon. We'll be back in North Dakota... later. At least by the 16th, since that's when I'll be going back to work. We don't have any definitive plans yet (we're such terrible procrastinators!) but I am fairly certain that it's going to be all kinds of awesomness.

That turns out to be a perfect and unintentional segue into the main point of this post: Cupcakes! I found a lemon cupcake recipe that I like! And just in time it seems!

What I love about these cupcakes probably the most is the texture. They're moist without being falling-aparty and somehow dense and airy at the same time. They're simply awesome. They have a more subtle lemon flavor, which is okay because the icings that I made are both bursting with lemony goodness! And yes, I said Icings!

But lets start off with the cake recipe, no reason to get ahead of ourselves. The tale of the icings can come later.

Lemon Cupcakes
This recipe comes from The Cupcakery. She made mini-cupcakes whereas mine are full sized, but the recipe still works great.

You will need:

• 2 sticks of butter
• 2 Cups sugar
• 4 eggs
• 3 cups All-purpose flour
• 1/2 tsp baking soda
• 1/2 tsp salt
• 1 Cup milk (I use skim)
• 2 Tbsp lemon zest
• 2 Tbsp lemon juice

1. In a large bowl, cream the butter and sugar together with an electric mixer until fluffy. Add the eggs one at a time and continue to mix until the mixture becomes creamy.
2. In a medium bowl combine the flour, baking soda and salt.
3. Alternate adding the dry ingredients and the milk to the sugar mixture, mixing well. (I mix by hand at this point. I don't know how people mix dry ingredients with electric mixers and don't end up with flour all over the place.)
4. Add in lemon zest and lemon juice, mixing for an additional minute. It should look light and fluffy and fairly thick for cake batter.
5. Line your muffin/cupcake tin with paper liners. Fill each cup 3/4 full and bake at 325* for 17-23 minutes (20 minutes was perfect in my oven) or until a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean. 

The first icing that I made was a lemon buttercream also from The Cupcakery, which I thought was fantastic. It was maybe a little on the runny side when piping, but set up nicely in the rosettes. It was sweet like a buttercream should be and absolutely bursting with lemon flavor.

Lemon Kissed Buttercream Frosting

• 1 stick of butter, softened (not melted)
• 2 3/4 Cup powdered sugar
• 1/2 tsp salt
• 1 Tbsp + 1 tsp milk
• 1 tsp vanilla extract
• 2 Tbsp lemon juice
• Yellow food coloring (optional)

 1. Cream butter and salt together with an electric mixer
2. Add half of the powdered sugar and the milk and beat until well combined (again, I do this by hand because I don't want to try to clean powdered sugar off my ceiling)
3. Add the remainder of the powdered sugar, vanilla and lemon juice and beat until combined.
4. Continue to beat with the electric mixer (for real this time! Switch back to it!) until the icing is fluffy and forming soft peaks. Add a few drops of yellow food coloring to achieve the desired color if  you like. I always think things taste lemoney-er when they're yellow.


When The Gamer tried them, he had a lackluster reaction. He didn't dislike them, but after quite a bit of hounding, he admitted that he wasn't a big fan of lemon cupcakes.

WHAT???

He explained sheepishly that they always seemed a little too sugar for him. I looked at my cupcakes, deflated. Lemon cupcakes were really important to me. My grandfather, who passed away a few years ago, was a lemon fanatic. I wanted something simple and understated to memorialize him, and I thought a lemony dessert would be perfect. His actual favorite was lemon meringue pie (without the meringue, he'd usually scrape that off) but I don't want to try to make that. Either way, I wanted something lemony. I had resigned myself that he was just going to have to deal with not liking one of the cupcakes (since he loved the Root Beer and Apple Cinnamon ones) when I had a brilliant idea! What about the cupcakes was so sugary? The icing! The cupcakes themselves aren't overly sweet. The one thing that he loves above all other desserts is cheesecake, and in general, he's usually a fan of cream cheese frostings. I was sure I could find a good cream cheese icing to use.

After scouring the internet (i.e. visiting five or six blogs) I had yet to find a recipe for cream cheese frosting that didn't require lemon zest. Now, for one thing, I was out of lemons. I had some more lemon juice in a little lemon-shaped bottle in the fridge, but actual lemons were gone. I also have a confession to make: I suck at zesting things. Maybe it's my grater? It's one of those typical ones with four graduated sides, that looks kind of like this:

Typical grater right? Grate cheese on the one side, zest citrus like the Iron Chef on the other? Not so much. I usually just end up with a mutilated citrus and a gunky grater. I did manage to get two tablespoons worth out of two lemons (partially by taking a fork and trying to dig the bits of zest out of the crevices of my grater) but they were shot at this point. Is there a secret to zesting that I'm missing? Because whenever I see people do it on TV, it looks like the simplest thing ever. I don't know what's wrong with me.

What I DID find, however, was a recipe that used lemon curd. And zest, of course, but regardless, a new idea was planted in my head.

"Hmm," I thought "That lemon curd was awfully lemony. I think I might be able to make something up with that!"

For you see, I had bought lemon curd with the intention of trying filled cupcakes. That didn't work out quite as well as I planned. The cupcakes fell apart as you tried to eat them, and The Gamer said they seemed more like jelly donuts than cupcakes. But in the frosting! It will be perfect!

So this is my totally original Lemon Cream Cheese Icing!

Lemon Cream Cheese Frosting

• 1/2 stick (4 Tbsp) butter softened
• 1 8oz. package Cream Cheese
• 3-4 Cups powdered Sugar
• 2 Tbsp lemon juice
• 2 Tbsp lemon curd

1.  Beat the softened butter and cream cheese together with an electric mixer.
2. Add in 1 1/2 Cups powdered sugar and mix well.
3. Add the lemon juice and lemon curd and mix again.
4. Add remaining powdered sugar until you've reached your desired consistency.

This tastes like lemon cheesecake. Which means that my cupcakes now tasted like lemon cheesecakes, which means that The Gamer now loves them. Thankfully, I only had enough buttercream to frost about half of them, and the Cream Cheese got the rest. I even have a tiny bit left. No idea what to do with that.

So Hurray for success! I now have cupcake flavors decided for my wedding! And the moral of the story is that some people are buttercream people and some people are not. Thankfully, while The Gamer is not a buttercream person (which is still sad) he is at least not a whipped frosting person, because I really don't like that stuff at all. Cream Cheese and Buttercream, all the way!

Cinnamon Rolls

So the baking on this blog is straying away from cupcakes pretty regularly now... and the blog seems to focus mostly on the baking... I hope that eventually it will talk about the other stuff that goes on in my life, but really, there's not a whole lot else besides baking and wedding planning and work in my life right now. And since the baking is directly related to the wedding planning, and really the only part of the wedding planning that I really have control over right now... well, it just sort of works out that I end up talking a lot about baking. So I hope you're enjoying my baking and barefooting blog!

My best friend sent me the recipe for these Cinnamon rolls a while back. She made them in her bread machine and called me after they were finished to extoll their virtues and urge me to make them as soon as possible. I got all excited, bought the stuff I needed for them, and then remembered that I don't have a bread machine and they got tabled for a while. My last day off from work, I decided that I was in a baking kind of mood, so cinnamon rolls won out. Especially since I still had some Cinnamon Cream Cheese frosting left over from my Apple Cinnamon Cupcakes. This seemed to be the perfect place to use that up and for me to stop grabbing a spoonful whenever I walked by it in the kitchen.

Cinnamon rolls have an interesting history for me. When I was in elementary and middle school, before there was a ruling company that dictated what they provided for lunches, there was a sort of unofficial schedule to the lunches that we would learn after a while. Pizza every so many days, burgers every so many other days, I honestly don't remember most of it but I remember figuring it out and feeling very smart. One that we didn't have to figure out and occurred with perfect regularity every month was chili and cinnamon rolls on the last Friday of every month.

Now, I was a ridiculously picky eater as a child, and stupidly stubborn about it to boot. Telling me that I couldn't leave the table until I'd finished my peas only worked if you were willing to stay up with me until I broke, and at that time, I didn't really sleep either. My parents figured out other means to getting me to eat things I didn't like (which was basically anything that wasn't a starch) like Mashed Potato Volcanoes (more on those later!). Either way, the one thing that I would eat without fail or complaint was a peanut butter and honey sandwich. For this reason, I brought my lunch to school with me just about every day. And I had a peanut butter and honey sandwich for lunch almost every day from Kindergarten up through when I graduated high school. Seriously. I apparently don't like change.

There was one exception to my refusal to accept school lunch, and that was chili and cinnamon roll day. I wasn't really into the chili, and would usually try to find a way to dump it in the trash secretly or hide it somehow so that the teachers wouldn't notice that I hadn't eaten it. They usually caught me and I'd spend all of lunch recess sitting at the table because I couldn't get up until I'd finished my food. They underestimated the stubborn thing too, apparently. It was worth it for the gooey, sticky cinnamon rolls though.

I did have one complaint about the cinnamon rolls though. In between each layer of delicious doughy goodness, there was something evil lurking. Raisins. I wanted nothing to do with raisins. I got very good at peeling back my cinnamon roll to eat it layer by layer so that I could pick the raisins out, but I could not figure out why they would poison something so good with something so evil. At the time, I think I just chocked it up to adults being insane, or possibly just evil. Looking back, it was probably an attempt to slip something moderately healthy into something that they knew most of us would devour without thought. Guess I fooled them.

So in honor of the lunch ladies valiant effort to hide something healthy within something delicious, I give you Cinnamon Rolls with Apples. I adjusted the instructions for making it by hand, but if you have a bread machine, check the link for a much easier and less labor intensive way of going about it. Or, if you're strange like me and just really enjoy kneading things, give it a whirl the old fashion way.

Oh, and I did outgrow the picky thing eventually. I do still enjoy a good peanut butter and honey sandwich though. There are some things that just never get old.

Cinnamon Rolls
Borrowed from a recipe found here at AllRecipes.com


Dough

•  1 Cup warm milk
• 2 eggs
• 1/3 Cup margarine or butter, melted
• 4 1/2 Cups flour
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 1/2 Cup white sugar
• 2 1/2 teaspoons dry active yeast

 Filling

• 1 Cup packed Brown Sugar
• 2 1/2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
• 1/3 Cup butter or margarine, softened
• 1 medium apple, diced (I used fuji, but I think something more tart like a Granny Smith would be excellent)

1. Dissolve yeast in warm milk and let sit for a few minutes until it starts to look slightly frothy.
2. In the meantime, mix together the sugar, salt, butter and eggs. Add the milk and yeast and combine well.
3. Add the flour one cup at a time and mix well. Once the dough is pulling away from the sides of the bowl and no longer sticky, turn it onto a lightly floured surface and knead for several minutes. I couldn't get all of the flour in mixing it in the bowl, so I used the kneading time to incorporate the last half cup, which works pretty well.
4. Put dough in a bowl, cover with a towel, and leave in a warm place for an hour or until the dough has doubled in size. (My house is rather cold right now since the weather can't decide what season it is, so I pre-heat my oven to 100* F, then turn off the oven and let the dough rise, covered, in the oven in a ceramic bowl. Plastic bowls + ovens don't work out well. Trust me on this one.)
5. While the dough is rising, combine the brown sugar and cinnamon in a small bowl.
6. Once the dough has doubled in size, turn it out onto a lightly floured surface. Roll the dough out into an approximately rectangular shape, about 1/4" thick.
7. Spread 1/3 Cup of butter over the dough, then sprinkle liberally with the brown sugar mixture. It should be completely covered by the time you're done. Sprinkle the apple pieces over the dough on top of the brown sugar mixture as liberally as you want, depending on how much apple you want in your rolls.
8. Roll the dough up tightly and cut into 12 rolls. Place on a lightly greased 9X13 baking pan.
9. Cover and let rise for another 30 minutes or until rolls have doubled in size.
10. Bake rolls at 400*F for 15 minutes in a pre-heated oven (if you're letting them rise in the oven because your house is cold, this gets tricky. I set mine in the microwave while the oven pre-heated after they rose in hopes that they would stay warmer in there than on the counter with the cold air all around them.
11. While the rolls are baking, make your Cinnamon Cream Cheese Icing and make sure that it's soft enough to pour, rather than the spreading consistency that we used for the cupcakes.
12. Remove rolls from oven when they are golden brown. As soon as they are removed from the oven, flip them onto a cookie sheet and let them sit for a few minutes. The filling will have dribbled down to the bottom while they were baking, and this helps to re-distribute it. I flipped mine back over after a few minutes into the original pan because I like the sticky side down and the crispy baked side up. You could leave the sticky side up though if you wanted.
13. Spread/pour the frosting over the warm rolls while they are cooling.

These turned out awesome. I ate about three of them before they were even cooled and then had to stop myself before I made myself sick. Definitely made breakfast a highlight of the next few days! I only use about half of my apple pieces (and put the other half in a smoothie so that I could pretend I was being healthy) but I'd recommend going heavier than you think you need as I could hardly find the apple in most of them. Another reason why I think an apple with a more outgoing flavor like a granny smith would be a good choice. Gravensteins would also be amazing, but those tend to be harder to find, and they rarely last long enough to make it into baked goods when they do find their way into my house.

Summer is here

I don't know if all that many people would agree with me on this one, but summer has arrived.

How can I tell? When I walked out of the store I work in yesterday it was sprinkling a little, not pouring down rain, but a soft kind of rain. Not unpleasant in general unless you've had a crappy day already and the rain is just one more thing on top of it. I put my coat on, figuring it'd be chilly out, and... it wasn't. It was a 65 degrees outside. And humid. The humidity is back. I am not excited about that.

But, on the upside, if summer really is right around the corner, then that means I don't have to worry about missing a run because of a blizzard again. And I'll be able to plant flowers soon. I've been itching to get out and try to create a garden in front of our house. I have no idea how well that's going to work, but I'm going to try. I'm tired of being just another ugly gray house on the street. I want SOMETHING to set us apart!

As for running, I'm starting week three of the Couch to 5k program today. I've done the program once before and it worked really well for me, though unfortunately life circumstances had me sidelined not long after I finished it. This time around I've got a plan for continuing afterward, since the half-marathon is my goal. The first time through  I used Robert Ullrey's C25K Podcasts and while they worked, he and I obviously have completely different tastes in music. I used it for the first 5 weeks or so until I was getting into longer stretches of running, then I switched to just my iPod and my watch. This time, I found Chris' Christian Indie C25k Running Tracks. The quality of the music varies, as you usually expect with Indie stuff. There are some songs that I can't wait to get through until the next week because I won't have to hear them anymore, but there have also been a few gems. Run by After the Chase might be one of my new favorite running songs ever. Unfortunately, it was only in week 1, but I can add it to my own running mix and run to it after I get done with the C25k program.

I have today off and I think it might be another day of baking adventures since it's still raining out. We're supposed to get some thunderstorms later, and I'm really hoping for some good thunder though. I miss the thunderstorms of the South. But it does mean that yard work is not on the top of my list. I've got a couple things that I want to play with today, but we'll see how it goes. Right now I'm just enjoying spending the morning hanging out on the couch with my dogs and not having anywhere I need to be!

Lemond Drop cupcakes = Epic Fail

Okay, that might be a bit of hyperbole there. I wouldn't really say they're an EPIC fail, but a fail none the less. Which is sad. I suppose it was bound to happen sooner or later, but I hate it when something that I'm baking doesn't turn out. I don't get so upset when something I'm cooking doesn't turn out, because I'm not a very good cook. Baking is a different thing though. I'm generally good at it, so it makes me mad when it doesn't do what I wanted it to, i.e. be delicious.

I got the recipe for these out of Better Homes and Gardens most recent cupcake issue. They sounded amazing and looked even classier. With a big glazed lemon wheel garnishing the top of the artfully done cakes, I was so excited about these cupcakes. You can see the picture and get the recipe here: Lemond Drop Cupcakes

Alas, my cupcakes didn't look like that at all.

Here's how it happened.

First off, my mistakes. I didn't use Limoncello because I didn't want to hunt around the local liquor stores for it, and since The Gamer doesn't drink at all and I rarely do, I didn't really figure I wanted a bottle sit around for the next four or five years until I got around to using it in enough things. I suppose there is a chance that I might someday have guests over that like to drink (most of my friends do) but that's beyond the point. I used milk instead and tossed some of the crushed lemondrops in it to try to give it some lemony flavor.

Next, the recipe in the magazine was not very well written. It left out the step at the end of the online one where you roll the finished cupcake in the crushed candies. Or how they could be replaced with those pretty lemon slices. They were right smack-dab in the middle of the recipe. "That's odd" I thought. "Oh well, lets just toss them in and see what happens." This was not the smartest thing I've ever done.

I also don't really have any kitchen implements that are appropriate to crushing hard candies. I put the candies in plastic bad and pounded on them with a hammer until they were mostly crushed. This worked okay, but there were still some pretty big chunks. I thought it might add some texture, so I left it.

I also over-filled the cupcake wrappers my first batch. Second came out better, and you can see a marked difference between the two.

First batch is on the left, second is on the right. They're much nicer. I also might have overbaked the first batch because I was waiting for them to spring up when I touched them, as cupcakes are supposed to do. The time given in the recipe was woefully short (granted, my oven runs cool) and even the good ones had the toothpick coming clean closer to 22 minutes than 18.

The biggest disappointment with these though, is that rather than baking into the cake and giving wonderful nuggets of awesome in the center, the lemon candies sunk to the bottom and melted onto the wrapper. Making it nearly impossible to pull the wrapper off without ripping off the bottom half of the cupcake. Which was very very sad.

I will say that the overall flavor of the cupcakes was nice and light and lemony, although I added about 2 Tbs. of lemon juice on top of the original recipe because the batter just wasn't tasting like I wanted it to. They were very light, almost too light to the point of being crumbly and hard to eat.

The lemon buttercream was also very tasty. Very strong lemon flavor without being too sweet or too tart, but very very rich. That's why I tried to give it a thinner coating with a smaller icing tip, because I thought a big ol' cupcake swirl would be too much and overpower the cupcake. Even trying to go light on the icing, I ran out about 3/4 through.

The biggest fail though, was the glazed lemon slices. Take another look at the ones from the recipe: lemon drop cupcakes

Okay, here's how mine turned out.

To put it mildly, not well.

I'm not entirely sure what I did wrong, other than obviously burning the sugar instead of glazing them. I'm going to blame it the fact that they were cooked on top of the stove instead of inside the oven. As I mentioned before, I'm not much of a cook.

So there you have it. My first cupcake failure. We're all human I guess, and I'm still looking for a rocking lemon cupcake recipe. If you know of one, leave it in the comments, I'd really appreciate it!

Apple Cinnamon Cupcakes: Cake vs. Pie, can't we just be friends?

There is an eons old battle constantly raging between dessert lovers. Families divided, friendships ended. The ultimate question of sweets...

Cake or Pie?

Now, in the past, I have always sided firmly on the pie side as I truly think that pumpkin pie is one of the greatest foods ever created. But today, I bring to you a new question....

Why choose at all?

I got the recipe for these Apple Cinnamon cupcakes from The Cupcake Project, the same place I found the Root Beer Cupcake recipe. I promise that I do occasionally bake things that don't come from Stef's site, but she has so many delicious flavors to try, it's hard to resist! I used her cinnamon cream cheese frosting recipe, as recommended by one of the wedding couples she has baked for.

Oh My Goodness. These are amazing. It literally takes all of the things that you love about apple pie and puts them in cake form. Fresh out of the oven, without frosting, I could have sworn that I was eating an apple pie. The cinnamon cream cheese frosting is also spectacular, and as I had quite a bit leftover (since I didn't do big swirls on these) I've been snacking on it by the spoonful for the better part of the week. Or on graham crackers, that's another favorite.

Anyway, without further ado...

Apple Cinnamon Cupcakes

Apparently Stef got 16 cupcakes out of this recipe. I got 21. Not sure where the discrepancy is, but I think I filled my liners a little lower than she did. And I just seem to always get more than  most people do when it comes to baked goods. My measuring cups must be super-size or something.

• 2 sticks of butter
• 1 C + 2 T of sugar
• 2 C flour
• 4 eggs
• 1 1/2 C applesauce (unsweetened)
• 1 1/2 t cinnamon
• 1 C finely chopped apples (I used fuji, but I'm interested to try it with a more tart variety like granny smith...)

Cream together the butter, sugar, flour and eggs with an electric mixer. Stir in apple sauce, cinnamon and finally the chopped apple bits. Fill the cupcake liners all the way to the top (these cupcakes do not have a significant rise). Bake at 350 for 25 minutes.

I chose the cinnamon cream cheese frosting for a couple reasons. 1) Stef used it for a wedding, therefore it must be awesome. 2) I love cream cheese frosting and wanted to make it. 3) I had some cream cheese in the fridge that I wanted to use before it got too far past its expiration date and 4) I have no idea where to go about finding mead, and what I would do with the rest of it that I didn't use for the frosting. After making it and running into the living room with a spoonful for The Gamer to try, I remembered the dilemma I had with my rootbeer cupcakes, with the delicious frosting overwhelming the delicious cupcake. This frosting, being cream cheese based, was if anything stronger than the buttercream I'd made before. Which is why I chose the lattice-type decorations for the top. Plus, I thought it was a nice homage to the whole "this is a pie in disguise" thing. Like the top of an apple pie? Right? Anyway. Here's how you make it. It's super easy, I promise.

Cinnamon Cream Cheese Frosting from  The Cupcake Project

• 8 oz. of cream cheese, room temperature
• 1/4 C (half a stick) of butter, room temperature
• 1 t of vanilla extract
• 1 1/2 t cinnamon (add more to taste)
• 2-3 C powdered sugar (add more or less to achieve desired consistency

Mix the cream cheese and the butter thoroughly. Add the vanilla and the cinnamon, then add the powdered sugar until you have it at the spreadable consistency that you want. I left this a little more on the gooey side because, well, I like gooey things. Like underbaked cake. Mmm, underbaked cake....

Overall, these were a gigantic success and I want to make them again, even though I still have some left-overs in my freezer (they freeze awesomely by the way). I do want to try them with granny smith apples to see how the contrast of the sweet cake and the tart apple works out. I'm also playing with a sparkling-cider frosting (because I've seen champagne frostings, why not sparkling cider?) to see if that adds a little of decadence to them... but they're pretty much awesome they way that they were.

Muffins vs. Cupcakes.

This question is apparently a very hot-button debate topic on the internet, so I'm going to jump into the fray.

Just what is the difference between a muffin and cupcake?

Many people give the simple answer that a cupcake has frosting and a muffin does not. I don't really like that answer since I don't think that wearing a hat changes who you are, and neither should the topping of a baked good change its identity. If I put on a chef hat, I'm still probably going to burn your roast, even if I speak with a fancy french accent and pretend to know what I'm doing.

(to clarify on that, I love to bake, and I'm relatively good at it, but I am an abysmal cook. I'm trying to learn, but I just don't enjoy it like I do baking.)

So I put the question out there to my friends on facebook and got a variety of responses.

One poster claimed that muffins have the option of having a "healthy" component such as fruit or bran or seeds, whereas cupcakes do not. The apple cinnamon cupcakes I'll be posting in a few days disagree with that though, and leaves me wondering what the difference between a chocolate muffin and a chocolate cupcake are.

There is argument that cupcakes are "lighter" and "airier" in texture than muffins, similar to the comparison between cake and quick-breads like banana bread or zucchini bread. My favorite way of explaining this (as gleaned from internet "research" was that when you throw a cupcake against a wall it will make a "thud" sound, whereas a cupcake should be more of a "poof". That theory was blown out of the water, however, when my brother's girlfriend brought up pound cake, and consequently, pound cupcakes. Those definitely fall in the "dense" catagory! I'm pretty sure they're  more dense than most of my muffins, actually.

On the more scientific side, I got the following formula:
A basic formula for muffins is 2 cups flour, 2-4 tablespoons sugar, 2½ teaspoons baking powder, ½ teaspoon salt, 1 egg, ¼ cup oil, shortening or butter and 1 cup milk. When the fat, sugar and egg ratio in a recipe reaches double or more than this, you have reached the cake level.

...Which puts my banana muffins firmly in the "cake" catagory. Uh oh. And my mom's amazing banana bread is definitely banana cake. And the best cornbread I've ever tasted at the pub I used to to work at is now corn-cake... 
And I'm still a little confused as to the proportions therein. Do you need to double ALL of those ingredients (fat, sugar AND egg) or just one of them? What about low-fat cake? (I know, blasphemous) I'm finding too many exception to the rules!


And then my dear friend Samantha gave the answer that laid the question to rest. 


"I do not think that frosting identifies cup cakes as they can be with out frosting and still be cupcakes. Maybe back in the day muffins were more "bready" and cup cakes were more "cake-like", but that is not true in this day of age. Muffins... can have just as much sugar and fat as cupcakes and be called "muffins". I think it is more like art. If someone calls something "art" (no madder how weird/obscure it is) it becomes art. If we call it a "muffin" or "cupcake" that is what it. Purely because someone says so. It is just a name. It's like compairing fuschia and hot pink. You can argue over the differences but really in the end they are both pink."

Cupcakes as art. I love it. 

Banana Oat Muffins

I'm not assigning a number to this post because, well, they're not technically cupcakes (an issue that will be explored in a future post, after I'm done collecting data!) but they're still delicious either way. Seriously, The Gamer and I turned into complete muffin-pigs as soon as these came out of the oven. This is not good.

Yes, those are snowmen on the wrappers. I thought I had more pastel wrappers, but apparently I don't. I didn't want to use the fancy metallic-y red ones for muffins, those are for practice-wedding cupcakes only. I never got around to making the christmas cupcakes I was planning, so I had a whole package of snowmen. This is not a secret desire for winter to stay longer, in fact, I just about cried when it started snowing again. But anyway, that's not the point. I just like fun wrappers. And snowmen.

Anywho, I had some bananas in my kitchen that were getting to that "you need to make banana bread" stage. You all know what I mean, where they're not quite rotten so you don't want to throw them out, but you don't particularly want to eat them either? Yeah. I love banana bread, but we usually get really excited about it for a day or two and eat about 3/4 of the loaf, then it gets wrapped in foil and put in the fridge. I'll rediscover it a few months later and go "ew" and throw it away. Which makes me sad because banana bread should never be thrown away, it is too awesome. I thought that maybe banana muffins would work better. They're quicker and easier than banana bread since there's no slicing involved, and they come with their own cup, so not as much mess.

I looked around for recipes, and didn't find any that I was particularly enamored with. So I turned to my mom's banana bread recipe, which is amazing, and figured "heck, if a cake can be turned into a cupcake, why not a bread into a muffin?" Oh how right I was. This is the happiest baking experiment ever.

Banana Oat Muffins

I used oats instead of the nuts that the recipe calls for. I usually leave out the nuts because I don't like them, but I thought I'd add the oats to make it seem healthier and more breakfast-y. I also have decided I really like the texture of oats, but am sad that they are usually paired with raisins, which I am highly opposed to. Also, the only reason I used whole wheat flour in this is because I realized after I mashed the bananas that I was almost out of All Purpose flour. You could easily do it with all white, or use more wheat if you want to go more that direction.

• 3 Ripe Bananas - Mashed
• 1/2 C oil
• 1 C sugar
• 1 1/2 C All purpose Flour
• 1/2 C whole wheat flour
• 2 eggs
• 1 tsp baking soda
• 1/2 tsp cinnamon
• 1 C quick oats
• pinch of salt

Peel your bananas and toss them in a medium-large mixing bowl. Smash them with a fork or pastry masher or whatever you have hand that is good at mashing things. Add the oil and mix well. Add the rest of the ingredients one at a time, mixing as you go. Line a muffin tin with cupcake liners (or just spray it with non-stick spray if you'd prefer to forgo the liners. As I've said before, I just like them) and fill each hole about 3/4 full. Bake at 350* for 20 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Makes about 18 muffins.

These were, to put it quite simply, amazing. So incredibly moist, very sweet, just dense enough but not so dense that you feel like you can't have another (I did. And another two after that!). I don't know what they'll taste like when they're cold, as I have managed to gorge myself on them hot out of the oven. It should be noted that my oven tends to run on the cooler side most of the time, so if you have an oven that runs hot, you might want to check these at 17 or 18 minutes. 20 was perfect in my oven though.

On another note, I remember reading somewhere once upon a time (I don't remember where or how long ago this was) that if you don't have enough to fill the entire muffin pan, you should fill the extra cups with water to help ensure even baking. So I tried that today. The muffins came out just fine, but they did cook a little longer (22 minutes) than the first, full batch. Which I found curious. I'm not sure whether to believe this or not yet, and I may have experiment. I do know that it made dumping them a lot harder, since I couldn't just flip the tray over on my counter and dump them out. The liners still made them easy to remove though, so that was good.

Only slightly unrelated, I picked up the newest Better Homes and Gardens magazine after work yesterday, it's all cupcakes! There are some in there that I really want to try, so look forward to reviews of those over the next few months. There are a few lemon recipes that can vie for a spot in the wedding, and even another root beer float cupcake with icing that uses actual ice cream. This might call for a re-test. We'll have to see how motivated I am. And how soon I can get my hands on some more flour. I've got to be more careful about keeping stocked in the future!

#8 - Running takes time

I don't know if there is a rule as to how long you're allowed to be a "new" runner, but I think I might be stretching it at 3 years. (has it really been that long? My goodness I feel old now!) The thing is, I like to run, but it seems like just as I finally start getting into shape for it and really running, either I lose motivation and quit, or something happens that forces me to quit. Sprained ankles (thanks to horses), shin splints (thanks to running), car accidents, and Winter (it gets a capital W here in North Dakota) have all been factors in my not quite following through with the whole running thing. The weather is warming up though, so it's time to hit the road! Slowly!

My goal for this challenge is a half-marathon. My eventual goal is a full marathon, but I think that might be farther in the future. I'm hoping that I'll be able to keep in shape this winter as I'll have access to the indoor track on base and won't be limited to ice-covered roads in sub-zero temperatures (I don't like running THAT much!), but I'm not sure if a full marathon is within my grasp quite yet. Who knows though, I might surprise myself!

Anyway, here is the other thing. I have hated wearing shoes for... well, for a while at least. I got a reputation as a "hippie" while I was in college because of my aversion to footwear and my refusal to use styrofoam dishes in the cafeteria. I eventually got over the styrofoam thing (it's hard to stick to principles like that when you're in a community with zero environmental awareness) but I still hate having anything on my feet, even in winter. Some research has turned up quite a bit of info on barefoot running, and I think I've found my love.

The biggest emphasis everyone in the barefoot community has for starting out is to TAKE IT SLOW. You have to build up strength in your feet and it's really easy to do too much too soon because it just feels so freakin' GOOD to be out there running with your feet free. I've gotten a lot of advice from the barefoot forum over at RunnersWorld.com and I think I'm going about this the safest way possible. I don't run more than a block at a time, taking breaks in between and I'm only running 3 days a week to give my muscles and tendons some time to recuperate in between. We'll see how things go, but so far so good. I've always had a lot of pain in my ankles when running, but so far, nothing. I feel awesome. My running buddy thinks the whole thing is silly, but is glad to get out and run all the same.

That's his "Is it time to go play now?" face. He's pretty much awesome, and the best running buddy I've ever had. He never complains about being tired, though I wish he'd put a little more pressure on me when I'm the one complaining! Either way, he's considerably chubbier than he was when this was taken (not long after we rescued him and our other dog, Abby) so this is going to be good for both of us.

And taking a nap on Dad is definitely the best thing to do after a run. Good boy, Shadow.

#100 - Root Beer cupcakes

Alright, a little bit of background here. I'm getting married this summer to the most amazing man I've ever met (The Gamer). Because I'm insane, I have this idea that there is no reason we need to hire a bunch of vendors to do the stuff that we can do ourselves. Despite everyone telling me not to, we're doing all of the food, including the cake, ourselves.

And by ourselves, I mean myself and my absolutely amazing team of family and friends. My mom and dad are really excited about the barbecue shish-kabobs that we're planning on serving, but they're a little skeptical about me making my own cake.

Or rather, cupcakes.

There are a couple different reasons behind the cupcakes. The first is that I like cupcakes, pretty simple. I think they're fun to make, fun to decorate, and fun to eat. The second, which is more practical, is since we're not having the reception catered, we're not going to have any servers. Rather than asking someone to take time out of having fun to cut and serve the cake, everyone can just help themselves to a cupcake. Makes everything a whole lot simpler. The third reason is because everyone has different tastes. I'm a serious chocoholic, The Gamer is kind of meh on chocolate but doesn't hate it, unlike a few of my other friends. We're both major peanut butter fiends, but I have a good friend who is highly allergic to peanuts. By doing cupcakes, I can have three completely unique flavors and everyone can be happy. Unless someone was hoping for coconut, because I'm not having anything to do with that.

Anywho, I've been researching ideas for a couple months as far as flavors go, and I've got a list that I'd like to try. Today was my first batch of potential-wedding cupcakes. Root beer cupcakes! I was going for root beer float, but I'm still not sure if that's the experience that I got. Either way, they turned out awesome.

The recipe is courtesy of The Cupcake Project, which appropriately is all about wedding cupcakes. Seriously, I can spend hours going through these recipes. I love it.

Root Beer Cupcakes
Makes 12 cupcakes

• 1 C root beer soda
• 1 t apple cider vinegar
• 3/4 C sugar
• 1/3 C canola oil
• 1/2 t vanilla extract
• 2 t root beer extract
• 1 1/3 C flour
• 3/4 t baking soda
• 1/2 t baking powder
• Pinch of Salt

1. Combine your favorite root beer (I used Barqs because it's The Gamer's favorite) with the cider vinegar and let sit for a few minutes.
2. Whisk in the oil (I didn't have canola, I used vegetable) and sugar and stir vigorously until frothy.
3. Add the extracts, then slowly add the flour, baking soda, baking powder and salt. Stir just until combined, do not overmix.
4. Fill your cupcakes liners about 3/4 of the way to the top and bake at 350 for 18-22 minutes (18 minutes exactly in my oven, and it tends to run on the colder side. I'd probably check at around 16 or 17 in a hotter oven, like the one at my mother's house)

The cupcakes came out moist and fluffy and delicious with a very distinct rootbeer flavor and smell. The Gamer loves them. SCORE!

I used a different frosting than Stef over at The Cupcake Project for these. I'm sure the cream soda icing is amazing and I love the soda fountain idea, but I don't have any cream soda extract, and really, what I love about root beer is root beer floats. So I used her Vanilla bean buttercream frosting as a jumping off point and adjusted it to fit my needs. Here's what I came up with.

Vanilla Buttercream Frosting

• 1 1/2 C powdered sugar
• 1/2 C sweet cream butter (room temperature)
• 3 teaspoons vanilla extract (adjust to taste, 2 teaspoons would probably have been fine, but I really wanted a strong vanilla flavor)
• 1 1/2 Tablespoons Whipping Cream

 Combine the sugar the the butter (which you do not want to melt! Just have it be soft enough you can squish it around with the sugar!) and stir until creamy. Add in the vanilla extract and the whipping cream and mix for another minute or so. Add more vanilla to taste or more sugar if you want it stiffer. It came out pretty stiff for me, but your results may vary.

Holy bejeebus the frosting was good. This the first success I've had with homemade buttercream. The butter flavor was pretty prominent, so I might experiment with substituting half of the butter for shortening, but we'll see. The vanilla flavoring was amazing and I think the whipping cream added a nice richness.

I loved the frosting so much I wanted big ol' rosette swirls on my cupcakes. And they were good, but The Gamer had a point with his comment that the flavor of the frosting kind of overwhelms the more subtle flavor of the root beer. I'll use a smaller tip next time and go for a thinner coating, but dang they were good.

A smaller tip would probably be wise in general, since I realized I wasn't going to have enough frosting after the first six cupcakes. I tried one of the skimpy ones and had to agree that the root beer flavor really shines when it's not mounded with delicious icing. I think it's good either way, but I think The Gamer is going to win this one.





These are a definite contender for wedding cupcakes, but we'll have to see after a few more trials. I'm aiming for three flavors for the cupcakes, and maybe a different flavor for "our" cake, which will be more cake-like so that we can cut it. Hopefully with a sword. We're still working out the logistics of that.

#59 - The Wise Man's Fear

Goal #59 was to read 100 books through to completion which, honestly, shouldn't be too hard for me. I love to read.

I finished The Wise Man's Fear by Patrick Rothfuss a few days ago, and I'm just now getting to writing about it. I needed a little bit of time to absorb it and accept that yes, it really was over. And I'm really going to have to wait a couple years until the next book comes out to find out what happens next.

I have a love/hate relationship with finishing a book. On the one hand, yay! I finished a book and now I can read ANOTHER book! And meet new characters and discover new adventures and be absolutely floored/intimidated/inspired by the amazing authors that reside on my bookshelves. I LOVE starting new books and I don't usually allow myself to read more than one book at a time. I get too easily confused.
On the other hand, that book is done. And if I've been reading it for a significant period of time (like I do with Rothfuss's books because they're freakin' huge) I'm always a little bit sad. I'd gotten so used to spending my breaks at work and my evenings with Kvothe, that now I find myself musing about what trouble he's going to get into now that he's back at the university, and how he's coming learning Yllish. But I can't. I feel like a good friend has moved far away and didn't take the internet or a phone with them, and didn't leave an address where they can be reached.

I especially feel this way after a particularly good book. I feel like no matter what I read next, it's going to be a disappointment because it's not my friend. Even if it's a very good book, if it's not as good as that book, it will forever be tainted in my mind. "Oh, yes, it was alright, but not nearly as good as this OTHER book that I read!). I then have to put a lot of consideration into what I read after I finish a spectacular book. I don't want to set myself up for failure by reading something that I know is going to be awful (If I wanted to do that I'd go pick up a copy of Twilight...) but I don't want to read something that I have high hopes for. What if I'm disappointed? Will I ever forgive that author? I just don't know.

Anyway, in case you haven't guessed, I would highly recommend The Wise Man's Fear and, before that, The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss. Especially if you like beautifully crafted character driven fantasy. The third book in the trilogy (known as The KingKiller Chronicles is due out... eventually. When Pat is finished with it. I love how dedicated he is as an author to the quality of his books, but dang. I can't even describe how much I want that third book right now. I'll be patient though. Books like these are worth waiting for.

Anyway, I decided to step back into The Dresden Files by Jim Butcher next. Lots of books to keep me busy while I get over my heartache for Kvothe, and a completely different writing style. Where Rothfuss spins an absolutely epic tale with spectacular imagery, Butcher is full of funny wit and unexpected circumstances. And each book is a little more extreme than the next. I don't really know what else Harry Dresden is going to be able to get himself into that will top riding a re-animated dinosaur to battle evil necromancers in down-town chicago, but Butcher has yet to disappoint me. You'll be sure to hear about White Night when I'm finished with it in a few weeks. Maybe sooner. The availability of the following book might keep me from sitting around for a while being depressed that it was over. The Gamer owns the entire series, after all.

#48 - Piano again

I stopped by Barnes and Nobles after work today. I knew I wasn't going to have the energy to do a thorough search of the basement for my music books tonight, though I'm still hoping to find them eventually. I have tomorrow off though, and I wanted to make sure I didn't have any excuse for not practicing my music. So I bought a new book. It's another "Self-taught adult beginners course" type books. So I'm probably going to skip the first few chapters where they explain what a staf is and why there are black and white keys. Just going to see how far I can get each day until I've worked through the entire thing. Hopefully I'll have found my other books by the time I get there, if not, I'll go buy another one. I hardly ever complain about the need of buying a new book or two... :)

In other news, I have an interview for another job on Wednesday. EEK! I'm a little freaked out, but I really hope it goes well. I like where I work now well enough, but it's just kind of depressing. Not the job itself, but the fact that I got this fancy schmancy college degree and work in a grocery store... not that there's anything wrong with that, but if I have an opportunity to actually USE my training and skills... all the better!

#48 - Piano

I set up my keyboard in my general purpose craft/cat room (it contains all of my yarn, my sewing machine, my extra saddle, my cat's food, water and litterbox, and my keyboard, which has up until now been hiding in its box.) Cleared off the sewing table (with the machine I haven't touched since Christmas and probably won't until I find the extra cash to buy fabric for a saddle blanket) and set up the keyboard, found the music stand, made it fit, made sure everything turned on and still worked.  Yay!

Then I started looking for my music. I can't find it ANYWHERE! I'm so mad. I don't have the money to go buy more beginner piano books right now :( And I liked the ones I had! Going to search the basement more thoroughly in the next couple days, but I'm afraid they might have been eaten by the moving-goblins.